Bullshit RPG: The Story Begins

the wall that mexico paid for goes down.

( actually didnt lower it yet or did something else do it?)

You hear a voice booming from above "er wups, my bad".
The wall goes back up.

"I don't know who you are, but after this we will have words voice, understand?" She focuses her magic again and tries to create a large circle of healing magic on the side of Jose & Magyk man.

The woman spends several minutes drawing out a magical circle in order to create a sustained magical field of healing magics.

Staff (magic affinity 3)
unarmored (magic affinity 2)

magic affinity 5

(succeed after 5 minutes)

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'normal' :

Her work done she nods. "Well least I didn't create an exploding circle again." She then motions to the Magyk man. "Go ahead step inside, you should recover faster."

She then dismisses the wall that splits the room in half and looks over the Russian to determine how wounded he is.

Stepping within its bounds, Mistah Magyyk Man pores over the magic circle to see if he can replicate this magyyk.

Loincloth man lets out a guttural scream.

pAiN shoots up his body, spiraling outwards from the gaping, bleeding stab wound inflicted by the pothead spanish speaker. Why was he stabbed by the pothead?! This man was clearly EVIL. This drug user had even offered up his anus to be stabbed by that "Magyyk Man"... and how was this Magyyk Man unaffected by his glorious reverse suplex?

Wait, maybe he should calm down. Was it all an accident? No, that didn't make any sense. Regardless of the situation, no man has the right to offer another to be stabbed in the anus. And how in the world could throwing a sharp spear at someone be considered a friendly action? That's the very definition of aggression!

WERE THESE CYKA BLYATS NOT HUMAN????!!!!

"▅▅▅■■■■！！" he roars, clutching his thigh.

Jose hears the primal scream from beyond the wall and reveals a worried expression.

"Uh, you ok amigo? It sounds like you have high blood pressure hermanito, I know a lot about that cus mi abuela died from a stroke. You just need to relajas, its not a big deal anyways, I get speared in the leg every other day pretty much."

The scarred Spanish speaker takes another drag from his blunt, and tries to roll the blunt to the screaming loincloth man from a space in the wall.

"Here, need a drag?"

(The wall is gone btw, dismissed it after setting up the healing circle.)

As she walks up to the screaming man she makes placative gestures as she approaches. "Easy there, I want to help, I can take the pain away. Would you like me to do that?" She stops about ten feet away from him.

The Magyyk Mayne cannot. he can naaaaaght.

While the Russian man believes that his grapple on the magykk man was ineffective, it is very apparent that the magyyk man is severely injured; as the magyyk man stays in the magyyk circle, his pain lessens and his vision clears slightly. It will be at least 10 minutes until he heals completely.

In the center of the room, the man of Hispanic descent inexplicably crouches on the ground and carefully scoots his blunt in the direction of the Russian man and on the far end of the room, the Russian man clutches his leg while the woman stands a fair distance away and speaks to him.

Seeing no movement from him she gets a little closer,stopping at five feet away, preparing a healing spell to use on the man.

Staff (magic affinity 3)
unarmored (magic affinity 2)

magic affinity 5

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'normal' :

a minor healing spell is quickly prepared and ready for casting.

She finishes her approach and holds her hand out to his leg. "This may sting a little." She casts her prepared spell on the mans wound.

(again gon w8 a little bit for more responses)

Loincloth man accepts the healing.

Mistah Magyyk Man continues to rub his head as he heals. "Kusou, a spectacular failure, but a failure nonetheless. Although I gotta say that the spear wasn't part of the trick. Speaking of which, shouldn't you have pulled it out before healing the wound? Now it's just gonna be all sticking out when he walks and shiet. Like a leg erection."

"Oh figured I would use a little bit of the spell to numb the area first." After a moment of healing she gently, yet forcefully removes the spear then goes back to healing the man.

Numb

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'normal' :

The woman slowly circles her hand around the area the spear struck the Russian man's thigh. At first there was no change in the Russian man's pain, but he suddenly stumbles and falls backwards as his legs go numb. He feels uncomfortable as he falls on his recently penetrated buttocks.
The woman then carefully pulls out the spear from his leg. bBood begins gushing out of the wound but slowly starts slowing and eventually stopping as the woman applies pressure on the affected area with her hands that glow with a faint green light.
The wound on the Russian man's leg is now healed to a scar that will still hurt a bit when prodded; but the man is now free of any major injuries. The numbness in his legs won't fade for a while though.
The Latino amigo can still be seen slowly rolling his blunt over to the russian man.

She dusts off her hands as she stands up. "That should do it, the feeling in you leg should come back in ten or so minuets.

She walks over to the spanish man, picks up the blunt he was rolling to the Russian and walks it over to him. "I believe this is something he wants you to have." After handing the man the blunt she walks back over to the walls and examines the pieces jutting out, pushing each one in and covering it with earth magic to keep each one inserted in the wall.

The woman performs said actions while everyone else stops in their tracks, as though they're doing a mannequin challenge. Nothing happens when all the stone buttons are pressed.

Mistah Magyyk Man stands erect, taking out two wands. "Right then, on with the show. Everyone please put away your phones, buzzers, or any other distractions, like pesky magic resistant peeps." He whips the wands forth, encasing the Russian in solid rock to immobilize him.

"Word of warning magic man, you harm my patient, I will retaliate in kind." She yells over her shoulder as she examines the walls.

(Trying to see how much I can push the broad concept of life magic, and see if I can use it in ways besides healing, if I can't just and life magic is for healing only ignore what is posted below.)

After a few moments of examination she mutters to herself. "I wonder..." Using her knowledge of life magics, she tries to cast a sense life spell to see if she can sense others in the room besides the ones shown.

"Man mierda, you ninos don't understand what magic means. Its not about making stuff happen amigo, its about the show! I'm outta this boring place, adios."

Jose shrugs, and trying to walk out of the cave.

The magyyk man's head is still spinning and the wound on his head still exists, however the pain in his head has been reduced significantly and he is no longer bleeding from the injury. holds a wand in each hand and realizes that he's only really able to cast spells from 1 wand at a time, so the second wand is essentially useless. The wands are flimsy enough that if one were to attempt to stab another with them, they would more likely snap than cause harm to the opponent.

While the woman is speaking her warning, the earth magic attempt is afoot.
hit 4

The woman also checks for life signs:
hit 5

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'normal' :

bars of earth shoot up from under the ground around the Russian man, causing the woman to step back slightly and drop the blunt within the ring of bars. the bars crash down, meeting at a point above the Russian man's head. Although he is not encased, the Russian man is definitely trapped in the stone contraption.

The woman is able to attempt to sense life for a fair distance around herself. She does not detect any organic life other than the 4 people in the cubic room of stone.

Jose is unable to find any direct exit, so he begins searching around the room searching for anything that might lead to an exit. He begins tapping the walls to search for a hollow spot like a DEA officer searching for a hidden stash of guds. He notices that a hollow sound comes out when he taps the area next to one of the stone buttons (closest to the magyyk man).

The same voice from before can be heard from above. "Oh, darn. This was pretty enjoyable to watch. Do you really want to leave now? Maybe u guys wanna grab some stuff first? Or maybe kill each other?".

(Before I post just a quick question, has magyk man left magic circle? Doesn't say if he has left it.)

(assumed he just stayed there)

(Got it, also going to try pushing the limit of life magic again, and if you say I can't do this I will totally understand, and will post something else.)

After dodging the bars she turns to Magyk man and sneers. With a flick of her hand she tries to reverse the polarity of the magic in the field to cause harm rather than heal (more pain than causing wounds).

(You can't modify the magic field since you determined its use during construction. The only way to modify a field would be to walk up to it and physically change the prepared components. Also just wanna point out that magyyk man hasn't in any way at any point in time directly caused physical harm to the Russian man)

The Russian man's head is spinning. How could he be trapped in this case of stone? Why had he been thrown into this hell?

"LET ME OUT," he screams.

(Well least that answers my questions about life magic, last post can be disregarded entirely. Also didn't know if you noticed, I actually stepped away from the Russian man and to the walls again, but I'll roll with it.)

She turns to the Magyk man and just stares. "Just remember what I said." Before she leaves the russian she uses one last healing spell to remove of the numbness in his leg, giving an apologetic smile to him as she dworks on him. "Sorry about this, did not expect to wake up with such company. Though probably none of us expected this."

Afterwards she turns back and heads towards the walls, stopping a few feet away from one, gets on her knees in a meditative pose. "I know I want to leave, and I think to spear throwing man wants to as well, but sense there is no way out I guess I can always try and make one. She address the voice before she closes her eyes and meditates, gathering energy for a large earth magic spell.

(Spending a turn or two to gather energy to try and use earth magic to create an exit.)

(oh my bad. Totally thought you meant that just used earth magic on all of the buttons for some reason. reeding is hard. gon w8 for more responses again before responding.)

(I did that, you said it did nothing so im trying something different. Going to try and use earth magic to create a hole in the wall to leave.)

(yeah, I thought you meant that u just stayed in place while casting the magic instead of moving to each spot, so my bad. It still does nothing tho.)

While preparing her earth magic, everyone else stands still and watches with anticipation.

While still in preparation, Emmilia senses that there is stone stretching beyond what she can imagine in every direction. It seems as though it would not be possible to dig out into whatever one may imagine the open world to be.

(Sorry unexpected things came up, air conditioning broke so no cooking or computer to keep the house not as hot as outside, resuming posting.)

Sensing that making a tunnel would be useless, she instead creates a medium sized dome around her. From the outside muffled shouts are heard, but are unable to be made out. After a solid minute the dome comes down and she gets up from kneeling and walks over to the walls examining them for anything she may have missed.

Hit 5

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'normal' :

The woman vents in her done and searches the walls to no avail.

Everyone else just sits by idly and watches.
The voice yawns and remarks "ok, this is boring now. U wanted to leave, right?"

Mistah Magyyk Man is disappointed at how weak the magicks are here. He snaps a wand in half, tossing it in the fire. "MUDA!" He shouts, doing the same to the other wand. "mudamudamuda..." He picks his staff back up and encases the motionless Spanish man in rock up to the neck, then takes a two handed hammer off the wall and smashes the man's head in.

The magyyk man is no longer wounded, however his head is still spinning.
in duh fookin earth (+1 magic affinity)
hit: 5

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'normal' :

Nothing happens and the magyyk man feels somewhat mentally drained.

Sighing, Mistah Magyyk Man picks up the joint and resumes SMOKING UP, as well as jumping onto Jose and dry humping him into unconsciousness.