Chocolate Destiny: The BROad to BROkeback Mountain

The member 'Corenat Rovarnus' has done the following action : Dice Roll\'d

'Coin' : 2

"Ayy, that bridge be lookin' pretty tight, knowwhatimsayin?"

Gray leads the wagon in a slow approach to the stone bridge, carefully eyeing the protrusion to find out what it could be, he does not yet cross, but fires his gun at the protrusion in an attempt to elicit a response.

The protrusion resolves into a smooth walled house with a peaked roof, one large door opening onto the bridge. Gray fires his gun, and the bullet embeds itself into the wall with a small crack. Very loud muttering comes from within, but neither Jorah or Gray can understand it.

"Ey bruh, u's duh wizard wit duh kush? We got sum cheesy poofs. Let us get summa dat dank kush mayne."

A cough. "I'm no wizard, and you just ruined my damn paint job, bub!" The voice booms. Indeed, the bullet's impact has marred the artificial blue coloring of the wall. "What are you, an Imperial?"

"Maybe, maybe not, it all depends on who you are sir."

"Oh really? So if I was an elderly black woman with failing eyesight and a prison record, who would that make you?"

"Well then, I would be your grandson if that were true," Gray jested.

The voice changes to a thundrous falsetto. "Oh, lovely! Come, give grandma a kiss." Smooching sounds are heard.

Jorah attempts to sneak behind Gray and push him towards the sound of the smooching lips
"eh, giv her a kiss, luv"

Gray stumbles a bit forward due not at all expecting Jorah to just push him, but catches himself before he falls over.

"Brother, please don't push! What if I accidentally cracked my head on the pavement? If you wish to hurry you can go first, while I make some preparations to meet my grandmother."

Gray his bedroll, and props it right side up, and then dresses it in the red dress and then the leather armor that he looted from Noire's unfortunate corpse. Afterwards he binds an empty ration sack to the top with some rope to resemble a "head".

This crude doll is placed in the driver's seat, as Gray loads his pistol and hides inside of the wagon. He prods the horse to go over the bridge while hidden, and carefully aims his weapons at the stone recess as the wagon approaches it.

The wagon is just about to reach the beginning of the bridge when the falsetto rings out again. "Hold your horse, young man! Is that a dress you're wearing? You ought to go home and change into some proper clothes right this instant. I won't have any grandson of mine be a crossdresser!"

Gray, alarmed by the implications that whatever is in the stone structure saw his preparations, fills another empty sack with some of the smoke sticks and continues to advance the wagon.

"Grandma, I must tell you that this is a... habit I've acquired recently. Won't you accept me for who I am like you've always done?"

"Ya gurl, dun h8"
Jorah realizes Gray's intentions and leaves the wagon, grabbing the mithril armor on the way off.
"Well, have fun with grandma. Carlito and I will wait by the riverside for you"

After waving goodbye to the wagon, Jorah's face suddenly changes from lax to super tense.
"Shiet! I forgot may banjo!"
Jorah turns and reaches out his hand towards the wagon in slow motion.
"Noooooooooooo, mah banjooooooooo"
Jorah's voice distorts from a normal speed to slow motion as he begins running (in slow motion) towards the wagon as it slowly advanced towards the bridge.
"Nooooooooooooo"

"I always have, my dear boy. But this is not who you are. This is nothing but a foolish fashion trend. I can not tolerate it on my property."
The voice originates from a window, a mere square hole in the house's side. It appears to be dark inside, but with the utmost scrutiny Gray can barely make out the outline of a large shape. If he had to describe the shape, the first thing that comes to mind would be an ice cream cone with a single scoop on top, but that couldn't be what it is. That would be too absurd, wouldn't it?

The member 'Corenat Rovarnus' has done the following action : Dice Roll\'d

'Coin' : 1

Jorah stops chasing the wagon. For some reason his banjo doesn't seem as important to him anymore. He feels like he should put on the armor.

Jorah equips the armor

Gray fires his gun into the window.

The faint sound of an impact can be heard. "Ouch! How rude."
The wagon is almost halfway across, close to the door. The voice changes back to "normal" tone.
"Crossing ain't free, bub. You gotta pay for the privilege."

As soon as the cuirass is secured, it begins to shrink, its contours shifting to fit tightly around Jorah's torso.
Carlito's voice now rings extremely loudly in his head. "SHIET MAYNE, DIS IS GREAT! YOU WANNA GO DO SOME DIGGIN'? DIGGITY DIG?"

"Haha, I was just testing out my gun, we don't actually plan to cross, don't worry."

Gray turns the wagon around and heads for the muddy ford while loading another shot.

"Wait! You went 40% of the way across, so why don't you pay 40% of the toll?"

"Dang Carlito, u too loud bruh. simmer down mayne."
Jorah starts heading to the wagon to grab his banjo.
"Y u wanna diggity dig, dawg? I thot we wuz tryin ta get to duh weezerd and git yo $t@sh."

"OH, DAS TRU. WE GOT ENOUGH DIGGERS ALREADY. ITS YO CHOICE."

"c'mon dawg, turn it down a bit. who deez other peeps be? Can I talk to dem? Dey sound liek sum pretty coo peeps. Anyways, lezgo find dat weezerd. Gotta git dat loot."

"Alright, Grandma, how much is 40% of the toll? I'll pay it now."

After grabbing the banjo, Jorah starts heading towards the ford.

"That's 48 rooks, darling. Just leave it on the edge of the bridge, I'll get it later."

"YEAH! LEGGO!" Carlito shouts. Jorah finds himself walking towards the bridge.
"Oh, a knight in shining armor! Sorry but you have to pay too," the voice from the house says.

"Alrighty grandma, whatever you say."

Gray goes into the wagon, and empties out his sack full of smoke sticks, and instead loads it up with rocks, and some copper coins for a proper jingle, into the approximate volume of what 48 gold rooks would be like.

He then drops the "money bag" 5 meters away from the edge of the bridge, and turns around immediately for the ford, leaving Jorah to do whatever he pleased.

"Dangit Carlito, controlling mah actions ain't cool."
Jorah sighs
"Can I pay your toll... with song?"

[Jorah beings playing "Law the Second: Universal Entropy Increases"]

[While Gray is heading over to the ford]
"I don't know, that song sounds a bit scary," the bridge keeper remarks. Carlito agrees.

Jorah pauses for a moment.
"Dang, dawg. U scurred of a song. Dayum. Alright, I guess I'll switch to something else den"

[Jorah plays 6 verses of "Law the Third: A Pure Crystal’s Entropy"]
If nothing out of the ordinary happens after Jorah finishes then:
[Jorah will transition into playing "Law the First: Energy is Conserved"]

[Jorah's ability has no overt effect, as there are no enemies nearby using abilities or moving.]
Gray feels a faint boost to his willpower.
"Well, these are some pretty weird songs, and I've never heard them before so I'll give ya a big discount. 30 rooks is your toll."

Jorah take out 30 rooks.
"alrighty then. Where do I put duh moneyz?"

"Put it on the windowsill as you come by."

Jorah walks across the bridge, placing the money on the wondowsill as he passes by and casually
[Jorah sings 9 verses of "Law the Third: A Pure Crystal’s Entropy"]

After Jorah deposits the money, the ice cream cone emerges into the light, revealing its true form: The preserved head of a wolf wearing a pink nightcap. The lower jaw looks like it was hacked off and then stitched back on. The rest of its body is clad in a matching nightgown, and draped over what can only be assumed to be a very large arm. The wolf's stiff forelegs gather up the toll, and the mouth flaps.
"Thanks for your business, have a quixotic day!"
Jorah reaches the other side, where a dirt path leads into a forest of evergreen pines.

Meanwhile, Gray begins to ford the river. Murky brown water sloshes at his ankles. Mud squelches as boots, horseshoes, and wheels press on the shallow bottom.

The member 'Corenat Rovarnus' has done the following action : Dice Roll\'d

'd4' : 2

The bottom suddenly drops to a deeper level near the middle, forcing Gray to proceed more carefully. This could take a while.

Jorah looks for and starts moving towards a relatively empty area out of earshot of anyone (it doesn't matter if Gray can hear Jorah or not).
After finishing the 9 verses of "Law the Third: A Pure Crystal’s Entropy"
[Jorah will transition into singing "Law the First: Energy is Conserved"]

After finishing the 9 verses, Jorah catches his breath, as he has been singing quite a lot. He starts on Law the First.
"AYY WHAT YOU STILL SINGING FOR MAYNE? THE TOLL ALREADY PAID, LEGGO!"
Jorah finds himself walking into the forest.

Jorah pauses for a moment
"The tune's nice bruh. I like it."
Jorah continues singing for 2 more seconds and
["Law the Third: A Pure Crystal’s Entropy"]

After activation, Jorah immediately undoes the Mithril armor and moves a few feet away from it.

[Triggered]
Jorah's plan goes off without a hitch, and the mithril cuirass clatters to the ground.
Carlito's voice is softer now.
"Aw nah, what you gotta do dat fo'? Thought you wuz mah homeboi?"

Jorah smirks as his face slowly contorts with disgust.
"I thought so as well, until you decided to control my actions. No one controls my actions."

[Jorah repeatedly plays "Law the Second: Universal Entropy Increases"]
until anything notable happens.

"I just wanted mah kush mayne, everytang be fine after dat."
Jorah begins Law the Second.
"Uh, we tight again bruh? We cool?"
[A few verses later]
"Dat song gimme duh creeps."

Several verses after that, something notable happens: Gray finally reaches the other side of the river, his legs and the lower part of the wagon and horse dripping with muddy water.

Jorah turns to face Gray
"looks like u had lots of fun"

[Jorah continues playing "Law the Second: Universal Entropy Increases"]
until anything else notable happens

"Right you are my brother, anything that can save money is fun!"

Gray casts a suspicious glace towards the armor on the ground, and uses his saber to lift the cuirass onto the wagon

"I see you've recognized the danger that that being poses, well big risk big reward I suppose. Onward we go unless you have some other suggestion brother Jorah."

Gray leads the wagon to continue on the way which Carlito has indicated.

Jorah climbs into the wagon as well.
"I suggest we destroy this piece of shit before we reach our destination, in case he might turn against us at a crucial moment. I don't really like relying on him, but I will try to smite him using the power of the lord. This may take a while though."

[Jorah continues playing "Law the Second: Universal Entropy Increases"]
until anything else notable happens

"Wah-what's happenin'? Mommy, what's going on? Mommy? Where are you? Don't let him hurt me, Mommy! Please....I'm scared...NO DADDY NOOOOO!!!!"

An hour of singing later, Jorah can see the faint impression of a face on the cuirass.