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Bullshit RPG: Farm Boizzzz

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Post by The Lord Kelvin on 2017-09-23, 00:35

Emmilia starts making her way towards the town center when she notices the Magyyk man poping out of some bushes at the side of the building and rushing in through the front door, closing it behind him.

Upon entry, the Magyyk man notices that everyone in the building has stopped making small talk with their eyes on him.
Podrick Fucking Payne takes a few steps towards the Magyyk man.
"Ah, Lady Emmilia's skin-changer. Why are you here without your master? Please go fetch her and inform her that we will be starting soon."

At this time, Emmilia arrives at the front of the town center and Erghun-Rho remains unseen in the bushes.
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Post by InteroVegas on 2017-09-23, 00:49

Erghun-Rho waits patiently. He understands that at the present his intervention will only cause chaos and delay the organization of the peasant rebellion.
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Post by kaede on 2017-09-23, 00:52

She stops upon seeing magyyk man and ponders just leaving him to whatever fate has in store for him.
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Post by InteroVegas on 2017-09-23, 00:56

At this point Erghun-Rho whispers out to Emmilia.

"Misssus, your other-world waays and aberrant degree of sensibil-*cough*-ty is the only ability that can direct these peassssants flows together. *cough* Without you they are 'doomed'."
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Post by kaede on 2017-09-23, 01:12

"As you say, i am not of this world why should they trust someone who is more of an outsider then they are in this world? Why would they follow someone who is more like their oppressors than themselves?"
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Post by InteroVegas on 2017-09-23, 02:40

Erghun shuffles around a little, to try and better obscure himself in the bushes as he speaks.

"Stiill, they will come to respect the brilliance *cough* of your soull. Would you noooot have control over the flow of what is to come *cough* you will be able to redirect it."
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Post by kaede on 2017-09-23, 02:50

"..." She simply says nothing as she approaches Pod. "I am here sir, and I take offense that you say that I am in charge of this...person. I ask what is it you need from me."
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Post by The Lord Kelvin on 2017-09-23, 09:28

(just realized I forgot to do the shitty accent in my last post, lol)
As Emmilia opens the doors, she finds the Magyyk Man at the center of attention. Some attention is shifted at her, but the attention of the people here are mostly directed at the flamboyant person in front of you.

"Thanks fer com'n. We didn't mean no offense, ma'm; we didn't mean to call your slave a person. Anyways, we're in sum dire straits. Ta be honest, we're pretty desperate at dis point. Dat's why we're gon trust you though you've been friendly wit dose knights. I'm sure you've been around town and noticed we ain't got much in da way of weapons or dafences. We'd like yer help wit dat. 'fore we git into da details, help yerself to sum breakfast."
Pod gestures to a small table with some hard boiled eggs, half a wheel of cheese, and some freshly baked and sliced bread.

"'O course, I'm sure you've got a lot on yer mind, being a roamer 'n all. Please let us know if ya got any questions. Don't think da knight's gon let you join dem after what you did to 'em."
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Post by Corenat Rovarnus on 2017-09-23, 11:03

"Yes! ZA FOOD" Mistah Magyyk Man runs in and starts cracking eggs into his mouth.
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Post by The Lord Kelvin on 2017-09-23, 11:20

The stares at the Magyyk man grow more intense.
"I'm not sure how they do it where you come from, but slaves should be taught some respect."
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Post by kaede on 2017-09-23, 11:57

'I don't have slaves. He is unaffiliated with me in anyway and if it was my choice it would remain that way. " She simply takes a slice of bread and cuts some cheese off of the wheel and slowly begins eating. She pauses for a moment and after swallowing her food looks at Pod. "What is it you would have us do for you?"


Last edited by kaede on 2017-09-23, 13:13; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : I blame just waking up for typos)
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Post by The Lord Kelvin on 2017-09-23, 12:55

"Hmm, I guess one 'o da others in yer group is this skin-changer's master."

Pod shoos the Magyyk Man off.
"Go git yer master. Dis food ain't fo da likes of you."

Some of the other peasants pull out a roughly drawn map. Prominent features include the castle town and three surrounding villages. One of the villages seems to be a coastal area, another in a mountainous region, and the last being close to a large expansive forest area.
"Chuck here has been make'n dis for weeks."

Pod motions towards a muscle-bound shirtless man with sharp features and dark hair wearing slacks and a belt.
"If we're gon fight, den we gon need da other villages ta help us. After y'all put knock'd out Puck's squad, we were able to kill them 'n hide their bodies. But DAYUMM, y'all made quite a mess. Dem noble's prolly gon take a week er two ta figure what happen'd. Meanwhile, we gon git help."

Pod points at the village by the mountains.
"Now, Dursk's Deep is village in da mountain's we on gud terms wit, ya see. So we gon group up with'm ta discuss stratigy."

Pod's finger slides over to the village by the ocean.
"Abserrum... we ain't too close to. We figure'd y'all got more 'o dem articulate'n skills, so we'd really 'preciate it if you could talk 'em in to join'n us. Abserrum's a trade'n town, so if y'all could git 'em on our side, we'd really hit dem nobles where it hurts."
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Post by kaede on 2017-09-23, 13:18

"And the town by the forest? What do you plan to do about that one?"
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Post by The Lord Kelvin on 2017-09-23, 13:26

"Oh, yes. I suppose yer new here. That's us."
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Post by kaede on 2017-09-23, 14:01

"Do you know how hard it will be to convince a merchant town to not trade with one of their biggest money makers?"
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Post by The Lord Kelvin on 2017-09-23, 14:19

"Da ridiculous laws and taxes of da nobles affect dem just as much as us. They have as much reason ta help us as dey have ta stay with da nobles. We just need ta pull 'em over."
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Post by kaede on 2017-09-23, 15:42

"Well, what can you give them that can pull them over to our side?"
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Post by The Lord Kelvin on 2017-09-23, 16:03

"Exactly wot they wouldn't git if they didn't join our side. Da means of food production without trading wit foreigners."
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Post by kaede on 2017-09-23, 16:28

"Alright, I'll see what I can do. Now I do have a few questions." She takes another bite of her bread and cheese. "What is this kingdom's opinion on us 'roamers'. Second, does the castle town have any other trading areas besides the coastal town? Third, is there a college of magi in this kingdom."
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Post by The Lord Kelvin on 2017-09-23, 16:42

"Well, dere 'aven't been roamers until 'bout a year ago. No one's sure what yer here fer, so e'erybody's got dere own opinions 'o you. Lioneye Castle don't even got an 'official' policy on y'all."

Pod rubs his chin and ponders for a moment before continuing.
"I don't know 'o any traders around da area. But Abserrum shud have e'erything you'd wanna look fer. An unfortunately da only mage's college is in da castle town. Ya can definitely find mages in Abserrum though; dey got money, and dat's da place ta spend it."
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Post by Corenat Rovarnus on 2017-09-23, 21:56

"My....masterr.....hmm..." The cogs on Mistah Magyyk Man's thinkpiece are turning. After cracking a few more eggs in, he swipes some cheese and bread and runs outside.
He goes over to the bush where Erghun-Rho is and dumps the food on him. "Can you eat this? I'll take it if you can't. Anyway, they have some sort of super muscles who made a map. These guys are gonna be teaming with some other villages, Sir Payne thinks it's gonna be a while before the knights come. How's that gonna affect your ritual thingy?"

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Post by InteroVegas on 2017-09-24, 01:25

Erghun-Rho tucks some of the cheese away beneath his face covering and munches on it.

"The greater the nummmmbers thhe greateer the ritual." Erghun-Rho carefully holds back a cough to finish swallowing his food.
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Post by kaede on 2017-09-24, 03:21

"Well because I don't want to repeat all of this to my...associates I will bring them over here so they can ask you questions and have some food as well." She heads off to where magyyk man went.

"if you want more food and ask pod questions come back. Though I ask that you show a modicum of table manners, or they will not feed you." She looks at the bandaged man. "You too I guess, seems like he brought you into this as well."
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Post by InteroVegas on 2017-09-24, 12:31

Erghun-Rho peers at Emmilia. Even hunched over he is close to eye level with the no nonsense noblewoman.

"I heard *cough* the quest they put upon you. It would make me giddxdy to tour this area with *cough* the social protection of having an indifferent *cough* owner."
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Post by kaede on 2017-09-24, 14:14

"Your a freeman do what you want, I just want to tell you two that if you have questions go over there and ask them."
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Post by InteroVegas on 2017-09-24, 22:04

Erghun-Rho finally figures it is ridiculous to continue huddling in the bushes. He stands up and speaks 'more properly' with Emmilia.

"*Cough* I cannot wander freely in thessse lands. The humans will inquire *cough* *cough* where I belong and what has happened to my owner. Ittt would obstruct the flow *cough* of my exploration to go on my own."
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Post by Corenat Rovarnus on 2017-09-24, 23:03

"Kekeke! C'mon Mistah Bandage man, this is what we came here for. Plus food, sorta."
Mistah Magyyk Man returns to the town hall. "ey b0ss, I'm back. M'lady suggested I use 'tabuu manors', so here ya go."
He makes a great show of sitting down, using eating utensils, and wiping things up.
"I got a couple questions too," he says while twirling a fork and spoon in what he considers a dignified manner. "First off: what roamers do you know of besides us?"
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Post by The Lord Kelvin on 2017-09-25, 07:18

The peasants eye the Magyyk Man with curiosity.
"Ne'er seen a slave use dem manners 'fore. Guess dat's how it is wit Lady Emmilia, huh. Don't know much 'bout da roamers 'fore ya, but I know dey dead now. Dere ain't no conflict here when it was dere time, an' dey flocked ta conflict."
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Post by Corenat Rovarnus on 2017-09-25, 13:15

"All dead huh? I dunno about my...companions but I'm looking for magyyk, not conflict so I'll be just fine. Moving along, does this place have a name? And who are the big shots round these parts?"
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Post by The Lord Kelvin on 2017-09-26, 17:30

A large wagon, powered by 2 brown, white spotted horses, pulls up to the edge of town and several people get off of it.
The wagon's driver just parks there, waiting.

It looks like the wagon was painted grey with a red stripe going across the middle.
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Post by InteroVegas on 2017-09-26, 17:42

Erghun-Rho shakily approaches the wagon riders. He waves out his hand with an air of mysticism about himself.

"Yeesss, yees, *cough* who do you have matters with?"
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Post by kaede on 2017-09-26, 17:47

Emmilia heads to the back of the crowd and to higher ground to get a better view of everything that may go on.
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Post by The Lord Kelvin on 2017-09-26, 18:09

The peasants mostly ignore Erghun-Rho, some giving him inquisitive looks.
From their hunched backs and bags under their eyes, it appears that the people disembarking from the wagon are tired after having just finished a long journey. They raggedly hurry to wherever they're trying to go, mostly to the houses in the area.

Upon closer inspection of the wagon, it seems that there's also a gnome besides the driver in the driving seat of the wagon.
The human driver is a tan man wearing a poncho like jacket with an intricate design and brown fabric pants.
The gnome is light-skinned and sports clothing similar to that of the human; while the human has a blue and orange color scheme on the poncho, the gnome has a orange and brown color scheme on his poncho. Despite all the horribly tired people leaving the wagon, these two seem to be perfectly energized.

Noticing the only source of sound in the area, the human calls out to Erghun-Rho.
"Hey there, welcome to the ABS - Red Line. Are you looking to board? It's 15 tris per person."

After calling out to you, the driver pulls up a gourd from the middle of the driver's seat and takes a sip of its contents.

OOC: my bad, forgot to reply to the "big shots" question.

"Dis is da town of Swindleton and we hold a town hall e'ery week to discuss matters of da town like we are doin' now."
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Post by InteroVegas on 2017-09-26, 18:43

"Mmmy ownerr has suddenly been sent on a flow that *cough* could be eased by wagon travel. Sheee requires travel aid to the mountain village and trade villllage."
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Post by The Lord Kelvin on 2017-09-26, 21:07

"mmm, I can't take you to Dursk's Deep. We only have have lines that run from Abserrum to other villages. This line will go to Abserrum, though, as well as some other beautiful locations."

Nikolai and Jose both emerge from the shack.
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Post by kaede on 2017-09-26, 21:21

Seeing that there is no danger she approaches the cart service. "Do you happen to have a direct line to the college of mages in the castle town?"
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Post by The Lord Kelvin on 2017-09-26, 22:54

"Yes, that would be our ABS - Purple Line. You'd have to transfer to that route from Abserrum, however."
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Post by kaede on 2017-09-26, 23:22

"And how much does it cost to transfer? Also would you happen to have a map of how your line's run and where they go?"
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Post by The Lord Kelvin on 2017-09-26, 23:59

"All our lines operate with the cost of 15 tris per patron. Provided that person continues on the same wagon bus, they are able to travel between Abserrum and any of our supported locations. Unfortunately, we are a new service currently in... betum? bertah? bertha?..."
The human rubs his fingers on his chin. While the gnome facepalms.

After heaving out a heavy sigh, the gnome speaks up.
"He means we're in beta. That means the ABS, or the Abserrum Bus System is new and still in testing. Soooo, we don't have maps detailing all the routes yet. The only way to get the whole picture is to visit our center of operations in Abserrum. It'll be the last stop on this ride if you're coming."

The human gives the gnome a thumbs-up.
"Thanks, buddy. I was forgetting my lines there."
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Post by InteroVegas on 2017-09-27, 03:26

Erghrun-Rho leans in to whisper with Emmilia.

"Brilliant-soul, the current of the flow takes us to thhhis trading village. -[Erhgun-Rho turns away to cough]- There may be opportuuunity yet for you to shore up your supplyy of roots and herbs there. Puh-lease afford me the time to collect my sparse belongings and I wiilll bear witness to the path you blazze through now."
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Post by The Lord Kelvin on 2017-09-27, 08:53

The gnome leans over towards Erghun-Rho.
"Oi, wutchu guys talk'n about?"
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Post by kaede on 2017-09-27, 09:57

She shrugs. "Dunno, they want me to do one thing, I just wanna take a detour to get some study material from the mages college before I do anything."
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Post by The Lord Kelvin on 2017-09-27, 10:17

"We've got membership based libraries at Abserrum. They may have the materials you're looking for.
Of course, if you want to visit the mage's college  in Lioneye castle, you'll have to trek over there yourself as we don't have any routes going there. They probably wouldn't let  you in anyways... unless you got a shitton of cash or have connections."

The human unravels his shirt sleeves to reveal some sort of strange wrist-bound device and points his arm towards the sun.
"We'll be leaving in 30 minutes, so try and decide what you're going to do by then."
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Post by Xenoe on 2017-09-27, 10:41

Jose pays no mind to the gang of oppressors and leans over to the Russian man.

"Hey amigo, you look like a just individual. We can't just leave these oppressed slaves to their own devices, these peasants are even worse than the castle nobles. At least the government pretends to protect the people in exchange for taxing them."

He heads towards the fields to find one of the workers.

"Pst, hey amigo, have you ever wanted to be libre?"
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Post by The Lord Kelvin on 2017-09-27, 10:56

The lizardman tilts his head at the amigo inquisitively.
"libre?"
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Post by kaede on 2017-09-27, 12:16

"I'll be going to Abserrum, don't know about the rest of them though."
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Post by InteroVegas on 2017-09-27, 14:13

Erghun-Rho confirms he will follow them. He goes to quickly retrieve his herb stash from beneath the floor boards.
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Post by Xenoe on 2017-09-27, 18:32

"Oh, how do they say it in the north? FREE! FREEDOM!"

Jose grabs the lizardman by the shoulders and stares hard into his lizardy eyes.

"Deep inside tu espiritu, I see the burning desire to cast off your shackles, and become the man that you've always dreamed of being. I know that feeling well, mi amigo. Join me, and freedom awaits us."
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Post by The Lord Kelvin on 2017-09-27, 20:26

"w-w-w-what? Who told you about the path? Be quiet about this stuff..."
The lizardman runs away.
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Post by Corenat Rovarnus on 2017-09-27, 21:31

"Swindleton, huh? You realize that's literally just a short form of Swindle Town, right? You guys do a lot of swindling here?"
Mistah Magyyk Man nervously checks to make sure everything's still there, and is relieved to find out he doesn't have pockets.
"Anyway, where do you guys trade your slaves? Do you do auctions and all that jazz?"
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