Filthy Xenos Adventures in Space

Frecka speaks up but is interrupted by a coughing fit that sounds like her lungs may come shooting out of her mouth at any second. Quintilus waits a moment before speaking over the wheezing astropath "Captain Firsa, you will find us to be more than cooperative so long as interests coincide. My interest is in serving Madam Borges as best as I can. To that end I have been instructed to assist your vessel in plying the warp, however, this does not mean you command us. We are independent entities aboard this ship as much as I'm sure the Orks and (he shivers) the Necrons."

Frecka stops coughing and finally manages to speak "Indeed Captain, I was sent with you to ensure communications can be maintained. Captain Borges has an interest in ensuring you stay within earshot. I will be at your disposal for sending other messages, but do not think us far from helpless. We will do what we can if interests coincide."

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Aten you successfully make up some tubing and such for the astropath. Whether they will accept your gift is another matter entirely.

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Dubshredda and several dozen boyz make their way towards the arena. When you arrive you notice that the area is not so much of an arena but more of a large carved out portion of the station that has had seats put into it surrounding a circular center. From your position you can hear crowds jeering out at the bloody sport and you can even manage to spot Borges and several retainers watching over the fights from up on a raised area of the stands.

Dubshredda orders the majority of his boyz to get to sifting through the crowd and the seats for a bomb but not to touch it. He takes a couple dozen orks with him and marches up towards Borges' box. He stares down any rowdy viewers who give him a nasty stare and callously brushes aside 'umies that block his path. When he finally reaches the guarded entrance of the box he grumbles " 'Deres a sneakin ork layin bombs all 'bout 'nd I'm tryin ta find it. Tell 'ur boss she gotsa problem."

"'Well, if there's nothing you need right now, then I'll continue to my request. I have given Captain Borges something of great value, and in return, she has kindly granted me access to her library. My interests lie in reading certain tomes of her's and she has expressed interest in my being satisfied by our transaction. Thus our interests coincide over a certain Captain Firsa enjoying some select books, perhaps in soothing armchair relaxing before a crackling fire.

However, as an eldar, I was never taught to read your language. To make good on both Borges and my wishes, I'll need a handful of people well literate in low gothic, and ideally high gothic as well, to help me with my research.'"

Aten rumbles to the two humans now on board, "If Captain Borges ever saw fit to allow me into her library, I would be most pleased. As a show of the mutual respect and trust which will grow between us, allow me to offer you these, Astropath Frecka."

He then extends forth the gifts, making sure to highlight the usefulness of both the contraptions.

The guards at the door to the overlook glace at each other before speaking "Wait here Ork." One of the guards goes in and after a couple of moments he returns and has you, and only you, come in. Upon entry you see naked human women and men lounging about a relaxing area entertaining a number of higher ups that Borges brought with her. As you are led through you pass by several more guards before finding yourself standing over the arena, which currently has four teams of five duking it out, behind Borges who resides on a throne of sorts with ten other higher ups sitting behind her. When you are introduced Borges responds.

"Ork I'm told you have something very important to tell me." with a wave of her hand the guards see the ten higher ups into the relaxing area "Now tell me, who dares to interrupt my entertainment before I set out on a quest to conquer?"

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Frecka doesn't move but speaks with a hiss to her words "I will not accept your filthy contraption Necron. You may be here by the Captains graces but do not think for a second any human on board will tolerate your presence any more than we must."

Quintilus interjects to change the likely aggressive retort that will likely come "Captain, I will make myself and men available to you to translate. Tell me though, what is the nature of the tombs you need translated? I know Borges to keep a number of... questionable tomes and I would prefer not to expose myself or my houses retainers to knowledge of a corrupting nature."

Dubshredda eyes the higher ups and takes in the genuinely strange scene surrounding him. He clears his throat and begins to speak: "Nah disrespect Kaptin strong 'umie. Sum freakin sneakin kommando been playin games wit me 'at 'dese past few dayz ... 'Nd now 'eez got a bomb setup in dis 'ere arena." Dubshredda desperately wants to watch the action but he suspects it unwise to turn away from the owners of the station after delivering such inflammatory news.

Borges doesn't move in her chair and keeps her eyes fixated on the fight bellow. You hear a the crowd roar at something going on but you dare not look away. "Attempts on my life and my property are nothing new to me Ork. What matters to me is that the people responsible are either stopped or retribution is made swift on them. tell me, why has this kommando ben so interested in you and why has he done this?"

"'Books on the Imperium, books on xenos. Books on xenos and the Imperium. Your usual fair for an enterprising eldar in search of lost treasure. I'm not trying to collect an intergalactic harem, if that's what you're wondering.'"

Dubshredda rubs the back of his neck and nervously gazing around in hope of the slight chance one of the boyz turns something up. "He'z a little ekcentrik, a Joker of sortz. While da point earz and tin 'eadz sort out 'dere bizness we been tryin ta deal wit diz annoyin runt. Figure you'd want ta know bout dis bomb cuz it cud interrupt da fightin."

[going to wait for Aten to respond]

"Well then, Ork, what would you have me do? I don't care to end these games as I have a lot of money invested into them already. If you are concerned for my well being as you claim I will be going down into the pits soon to fight the winning team. If I wished I could have every Ork on this station found and rounded up. Hell I could even have every single one executed if I so wished."

"Methinks 'dat wouldn't work too good Kaptin. Dis Joker haz sum plot-on, er... , spot-on evazive kapabilitiez. I'm 'ere ta try 'nd deal wit 'im me self but boyz be boyz 'nd findin one sad little bomb won't be too eazy ... Dat's all Kaptin strong 'umie, me 'nd me boyz off to search." With that Dubshredda makes the "appropriate" respectful gestures and leaves to search the stadium, particularly below it.

You exit the area and get a report from your boyz. They report that they've found no signs of the bomb but do point out how great the fightin' down below is. At the mention of the fight you look over and see that the current one is about done and you notice that Borges is no longer in her throne

Dubshredda moves on.

Heading down to the bottom of the arena you find yourself among a large crowd with numerous brawls broken out in it. You notice that a number of your boyz are in these fights As you move through you get numerous dirty looks from the men down here. You will have to roll some sort of perception test with a bonus for the number of boys you have help you with it.

Dubshredda and his boyz begin moving and looking through the area under the arena. In no time one of the boyz calls over saying he's found something and sure enough behind one of the closed off doors down here sits a bomb. On top of the bomb sits you hat in full Kaptain glory awaiting you to take it. The bomb is roughly the size of one of your boyz and could easily blow to smithereens whatever is above it. It does appear that the bomb was brought in piecemeal and has a blinking light presumably meaning it's active.

Aten moves closer to Frecka, the wheels on the wheelchair clacking ominously as he pushes it in her direction. Standing ten feet tall, his finery glittering in the lights of the bridge, he is quite an imposing sight.

"You speak quite bravely for a tiny fleshbag," he rumbles, his voice somehow going even deeper. "And a defective fleshbag at that."

Aten, looming over Frecka, bends down. His voice (and his expression if it could change) darkles as he speaks.

"Just remember where you are, human. You speak to the leader of a dynasty which has lasted since before your branch of the animal kingdom first split off from the giant lizards who ruled your homeworld. We crushed them without a second thought, and your vaunted Imperium," he says with disgust dripping from every word, "will fall just the same. Remember that I approached you with honor, with politeness, and with the hope of mutual respect. Your quick words do little to increase my esteem of you. You are strangers on this ship, and you survive only because of our dealings with Captain Borges. If you insult me, or Captain Firsa, you may find that life will become quite difficult for you, and your 500 men. Don't be fooled into thinking that they could cause any significant problem for us. We dominated the galaxy before you had created fire. Now that we have awoken, the balance shall move back into our favor once more."

Aten stands still for a moment, his green, glowing eyes piercing into Frecka's pus-filled sockets, before shifting his gaze to Quintilus.

"You seem much better behaved than your erstwhile companion. Allow me to expand on the Captain's list; after all, I am sure that Captain Borges has quite a few books on xenos and the Imperium. We are specifically seeking information on..." Aten proceeds to tell Quintilus about the list of items they are seeking, making sure to highlight the three unknown xenos races (the Critalin, Vuloir, and Damol) as well as actual books (such as the complete memoirs of Ciaphus Cain, Hero of the Imperium).

"'Oi! I do not tolerate disrespect on my cruiser. Aten, it doesn't matter that your race conquered the galaxy. Frecka, it doesn't matter that the Imperium is waging a brutal war against the necrons. What does matter is that we have a mission. And that mission will only succeed if we can put aside our differences and work together. Have you forgotten the lessons of Seer Baravyn's death so soon? You all don't have to like cooperating, but that won't change that you have to, nor will it make it any easier. You're all professionals here, so you better damn well act like it.

Aten, apologize or I won't let you into the library. Frecka, accept the apology, or my first report to Borges will not be kind about your performance.'"

As you command the two to come to terms you notice that frost has begun to cake every surface of the room and the temperature has dropped significantly. Quintilus stares are you unblinkingly Aten and you can't help but feel as though he can read you despite your necrodermis body. Frecka says nothing, waiting for Aten to speak.

Dubshredda steps up to the bomb. He either puts the situation to rest or dies in a violent explosion. He begins to work on diffusing the bomb.

As you work and tinker you manage to work through all of the wires connected throughout the explosive. You remember to cut all the green wires and none of the red or blue wires and before you know it the bombs activated light goes off. When it does, your boyz hiding behind some crates nearby peak their heads out to notice they're not dead

Dubshredda stands up and retrieves his hat from the bomb. He turns around and bellows out "KOMMANDO, 'UR BOMB IZ NO GUD. 'ND, WE BE STEALIN IT." Dubshredda subsequently orders a group of his boyz to carry the bomb back to the ship. He follows behind from a safe distance.

"Pardon me, Captain.  Am I to understand that I, who the humans will barely tolerate and call filthy, am to offer the apology?  I approached Frecka with goodwill, offering her the opportunity to ease her suffering, and she rebuffed my kindness with insults.  I bear no ill-will towards the human Quintilus; he has not broached my anger.  Frecka is uncultured and rude, and I will treat her as well as she treats me."

Despite his anger at his mistreatment, Aten is sure to speak in Eldar.

With the bomb successfully diffused and some of the boys carefully carrying it Dubshredda and company make their way back to the Tanorum. On your way there you are stopped by one of Borges' men who convey's her thanks for handling the situation and tells you you'll be justly rewarded.

Once you reach the approach to the Tanorums landing bay you spot a familiar Ork kommando sitting on some crates off to the side pealing some kind of fruit with his knife. He looks up and sees you, smiles, and waves his knife in the direction of the ship.

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Before Firsa can respond Quintilus speaks up "If you are going to speak ill about us men, Necron, have the decency to speak in a tongue we all understand. At the very least you au..." He is cut off by a very loud boom coming from the direction of the armory. A second later warnings begin blaring across the ship and an alert goes out that there is a chemical leak filling the vents. Additionally, several wounded or dead are detected near the explosives blast radius.

Dubshredda sighs and approaches the kommando. "Dat da best ur bomb got? Da pointy earz got magik ta fix all dat ... I 'tink." Dubshredda readjusts his hat on top of his head and stares at the kommando. "Wadz 'ur name orky?

Aten speaks quickly, "Another time Quintilus, another time. Evacuate your men from the area. They will not handle the chemicals as well as mine."

He then orders his men into the chemical smog to pull out anyone left behind. While they do this, he hurries to try and find the leak and patch it as soon as possible.

"'Jiminy Illunivar gobstopper! What in the blazes is happening on my ship? Aten, lead these fine fellows away from the armory and don't let them out of your site. Oh, and no talking either. I'll be taking the shortcut to the armory.'

By shortcut, she means running really freaking fast," explains Tristan.

"Are you sure you don't want your only trained technician investigating the blast?" Aten asks. "Perhaps we can keep them safe with some of my men, although I'm sure that you illustrious humans would prefer the services of your own bodyguard."

"Firsa is well out of sight and earshot by the time Aten speaks up. Her main concern is whether any eldar have died. She'll get as close to the blast as possible, but won't make a suicidal charge if the toxic air is too thick."

In that case Aten leads the two humans as far away from the armory as possible, making sure to stay in contact with his men.

The kommando goes back to peeling his fruit (some kind of apple type thing) before speaking up "Names Naztuf, it's too bad your friendz keep so many esplosives in ones place. Couldn't resist meself from putting the boom there." Satisfied with the peeling he takes a bite and speaks while he chews "Now den kaptin. What'll ya do witz me. I've hads my fun."

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As Firsa sprints off towards the bridge, and therefore the armory, she begins to come across a terrible sight. Eldar, Orks, Men, and even Necrons lay prone on the ground not moving and apparently dead from the fumes. A number of them are thrashing about violently on the floor as if their entire bodies are coated in insects. Firsa will have to make a toughness test to resist the toxins.

Aten leads the humans away and begins taking them out of the ship and into the station. There he notices Dubshredda and talking to another Ork

Dubshredda simply and smoothly swings his big choppa clean through Naztuf. The kommando's halves fall to the dock ground with fleshy thuds. Dubshredda snorts and nods, "Ya 'ad fun indeed sneakin ork." Dubshredda bends over and scoops out the dead ork's eyes with a scrap of metal. He buys a cheap glass container and a bucket of preservative from nearby and keeps the eyes to remind him of the event, and that someone will always be against him. Dubshredda rounds up his orks and moves to board the Tanurom. Along the way back Borges' servants find the Kaptin and present him with a "high" (by ork standards) quality power klaw. He is overjoyed with the gift and pats the servants on the back as a sign of gratitude. He tells them to notify Borges of his thanks and proceeds to go into the Tanurom.

"Firsa breathes a sigh of relief when she realizes the fumes are from her hallucinogen grenades. As long as the main explosion's damage was superficial, no lasting harm should come from this attack. Thinking about possible culprits, Firsa quickly rules out her eldar and the necrons. If Borges were behind the attack, it would have been far more devastating and more carefully planned. In any case, Aten is watching the important humans. This leaves the orkz, but she doubts that any of Dubshredda's would be audacious enough to leave the lower levels of the ship or clever enough to make a bomb.

'Then it's someone from outside Tanurom...' she concludes. 'Don't panic, the gas leak is merely hallucinogenic. I want crew with gas masks to investigate the incident and peacefully apprehend anyone who appears to be violent' Firsa announces to her ship. She then rushes outside to see Dubshredda standing in triumph over two halves of a fancy looking ork. Firsa smiles and returns to the ship where she continues with damage control."

Before Dubshredda can fully make his way back, Aten intercepts him. "Dubshredda, I have not seen you for quite some time. Before you go on the ship, let me warn you. A bomb was detonated in the armory. It contained some sort of chemical agent, which is damaging even the orks in the area. You may wish to take care if you go near the armory. oh, and congratulations on retrieving your ''at'."

"Tin 'ead! Re-joice metal 'ting. Orkz be ard, and I be 'ded ard! Dat kommando wazn't too gud, but we did steal one of 'iz bombz." Dubshredda points with his power klaw towards ork sized bomb being carried up the docking tunnel.

"Ah. Wonderful." Aten tries to figure out how best to deal with an ork bomb being brought onto the ship. "Just make sure you put it somewhere far away from anything important."

Aten then remembers his manners, "Oh, how rude of me. Please, allow me to intriduce our two newest crew members." He gestures as appropriate and says, "This is Quintilus, the new Navigator. He will guide us through the Warp from now on. And here is Frecka. We had rough first impressions, but I believe we shall soon warm to one another."

"Ugh, waz wrong wit 'er face." Dubshredda stoops down and yells at Frecka as if she was hard of hearing. "UR. FACE. ... WUT. WRONG?" Already assuming she is also mute, Dubshredda stands back up to look around at the ship and the far less boring corridor-street of bars. He shrugs and gives out a rousing announcement: "EY BOYZ! LETZ GO 'AVE SUM FUN! THE TIN 'EAD WILL 'ANDLE DESE 'UMIES FER US!"

Dubshredda and his boyz go back out on the town and while his boyz rack up tabs he starts shaking down 'umies at the bars for information on jobs and plunder.

Deciding that tagging along with Dubshredda is safer than facing the dangerous fumes, Aten tries to explain.

"You see, Dubshredda, when this young lady was trained in her psychic powers, her eyes were burned from their sockets. Since then, she has been unable to receive proper medical attention, causing her eyes to ooze uncomfortable amounts of puss. I fashioned her these tube-goggles, thinking it would be easier and more dignified than walking around with pus-soaked bandages all day, but my kind offer was cruelly rebuffed."

Aten shows the tube goggles to Dubshredda. He then calls back to Frecka. "You know, we may be walking quite for quite a while. Are you sure you don't want to use the wheelchair?"

"Why don't da ugly woman wear ur gift of goggles."

"She is offended by my Necron nature, and refused the gift. I don't know exactly what she has against me personally. Her rage seems directed against the entire Necron race. I'm not sure of her feelings towards orks."

"WOT? WOTCHU NOT LIKE BOUT GREENSKINZ LADY?"

Dubshreddas yelling gets the attention of the humans standing outside the ship while they're waiting on fumes to vent to turn and look at him as he walks away with Aten (who is a Necron and should probably reconsider going into the station).

As the reports come in on damages from the bomb it is discovered that numerous Orks and Necrons have been killed along with Commander Zuensyr and two other pilots who were checking on gear at the armory. In addition many of the Necron warriors gauss weapons have been destroyed in the blast and subsequently phased out along with the stock of hallucinogen grenades and a number of stockpiled Eldar weapons.

Aten realizes the danger of walking alone into the station full of ready-to-riot humans and returns to the humans.  He decides to bring them back inside the landing bay, but not onto the ship, which is now entirely full of gas. He orders out some of his men as additional protection for him and the two humans. If they wish to bring their men out too, he won't stop them.

As Aten goes and babysits the humans Dubshredda goes into the bars and throws his weight around for where the best transport robbing, abandoned stations, and planets with good fights to be had are. After three hours and a lot of drinking he comes back with information on some choice bits. He learned that there aren't any well known derelict stations about that haven't already been claimed but he does hear a rumor that a sizable space hulk was spotted in the Ramere system a ways away. It's possible that it could be converted into a station or have some other use.

For good fights he learns of three prime locations. The first is the planet of Erebus which is host to a Tau colony governed over by some "Farsight Enclaves." The world is apparently mainly inhospitable but is host to a large number of rare ores placed there by numerous asteroid impacts. Second is the world of Plaxus is host to WAAAGH Bloodwrench and has the makings of a glorious Ork vs Ork brawl fest. The third and final is the fairly vulnerable Imperial world of Metzti. This one in particular is reported to be a agriculture world that supplies food to a couple of other nearby Imperial planets and mainly grows a form of wheat.

As to reports of vulnerable shipping lanes you find out about two interesting locations. One is along a fairly stable warp route but ships frequently have to drop out along the path due to occasional warp storms. Such vessels often make easy pray for piracy but could result in stiff competition on the bath between Iliad and Ysal systems. The second trade route isn't so much a trade route but a common layover area where ships low on food supplies and other such materials will stop. The planet where this occurs is named Trepal and is host to a myriad of xenos species but craft sent down have an easy enough time gathering supplies for further journeys.

After shaking down enough poor sods for information Dubshredda gives orders to some of the larger boyz to gather the rest in a few hours. Dubshredda returns to the Tanurom to discuss his findings with Aten, perhaps he knows more about these "Tao".

"In the aftermath of the attack, Firsa calls for an assembly. Not long ago, such meetings consisted of every living member of the ship, but now such a congregation is impossible. Invited to the assembly are all the eldar, Aten, Dubshredda, and the human leaders. So gathered, Firsa invites those present to mourn those killed in the explosion, especially Zuensyr. She then asks the assembly to vote for a new first officer.

Once that has been taken care of, Firsa briefs the room on the various possible side jobs. 'Personally, I would rather get started on my research before coming to a final decision. Considering the great loss we just suffered, I understand the need to aquire more resources. On the other hand, I don't want to be side-tracked for too long from our main mission. Furthermore, without a Seer, Tanurom is practically helpless in combat, so priority one is finding a way to overcome this.

Now, I've spoken long enough. I wish to hear your thoughts.'"

"We needz money 'nd plunderz. Me 'nd ma boyz demand a fightin too. Even wit out da sword swingin point earz dis krooza can still fight da ork way!! I say we find ourselvez a nice ship ta take." Dubshredda grins "Might makez right."

"'You make a good point Dubshredda. Even though we won't be able to fire our main weapons, we still have our cavalry and a ship full of orkz. We won't be able to take on an opposing cruiser, but we should be able to deal with small amount of resistance. That said, we should towards a planet with large diversity, since it will increases our chances of finding a new seer.'"

"Neva seen pointy earz ming-ga-lin wit utters before. 'Ow long yur pervat mishun gonna take ya?"

Quintilus clears his throat to get everyone's attention and says "On the matter of who will be first mate I'd have to vote for the Ork over the other options. I myself and the astropath wouldn't make good candidates." Frecka nods in agreement before Quintilus continues "If the problem is crew then would it be possible to teach men how to work the devices? Orks are often able to come up with crude means of plying space so if you trust them more than men you could try them. I wouldn't recommend letting Necrons making any modifications." The last sentence he says with a glare at Aten

Dubshredda laughs loudly at Quintilus' recommendation. "Good 'un 'umie! 'Tanks youz fer da respect but dis 'ere pointy earz ain't even me Kaptin. She tried fer sure, but no pointy earz could eva be da boss of greenskinz! Da tin 'ead lookz keen on lissenin ta Firsa, 'ave 'im do it."