Dubshredda Solo Stuff

Do your solo stuff here Dubshredda

Dubshredda "wanders" up to the guards and asks "Wazzit kost ta get bitz and tek outta da storage?"

One of the guards turns to you from his companions and says through a helmet "You want to pay for these goods Ork? There's auctions every hour with things some merchants pull out. Alternatively you can always talk to one of the merchants about to see their wares directly. A little more expensive but sometimes worth it. You can find most of them at the diner over yonder." Sure enough you look where the guard points and you see a diner of sorts built into one of the walls. You see no signs of any auctions starting right now but it is possible there won't be some for a while due to the commotion upstairs

Dubshredda understands that he does not have the forces to raid these warehouses. He needs to double back and find a line of credit, or some sort of cash cow. He remembers the pointy eared ones and the tin heads. They both seemed fancy and ornate, perhaps they'd be willing to supply some of their bits for his daring bomb quest. Thus, Dubshredda turns around and heads back to the Tanurom.

As you descend down to the planet to the general vicinity of where your boyz have been landing you can begin to feel as though your'e home. You're not sure exactly what it is that tips you off to it but you know there are a lot of Orks down below you and you feel a large amount of excitement building up inside of you. As you land you burst through the shuttle doors and it takes off, leaving you behind, and heads back for the Tanorum which you may or may not ever see again. You take a moment to take in your surroundings and you see the blasted landscape with a couple of tossed aside trees nearby the craters your boyz descent left on this area of landscape. You can see numerous of them scurrying about the scrap wreckage and a few are chilling about dozing.

Dubshredda immediately sets out rounding up his boyz. He commands them to organize some kind of fortification from the scrap. He needs to setup a center of operation before he can scout the vicinity and round up the lesser orkoids that make the ork war machine as effective as it is.

As you round up the boyz you take the time to get a general approximation of how many survived the rok fall. You find that casualties come to about three thousand either because the roks burned up on atmospheric entry or the weren't built well enough and the orks inside didn't survive the impact. Either way it's not a huge setback as you have a hunch that you'll find more to replace the losses and hopefully will get even more.

The survivors set about building fortifications in the typical Ork way in that the walls aren't so much walls but heaps of metal somehow staying up in a wall shape. After two days you have a rudimentary fort one hundred meters by one hundred meters with a metalic structure in the center for you to rest, "plot", and hold "meetings."

"First 'tings first. I needz ta do sum skoutin." Mumbles Dubshredda to himself. While the crude fortification is an appealing place to rest he to get moving. He rounds approximately two hundred boyz and begins to scout around the vicinity of his new "base". Dubshredda pays close attention to the terrain and begins concocting crazy ideas in his head.

You led your boyz out on an adventure. You get a hunch that you'll have a lot of time here to get your work done and so you set out in earnest. You take a week to go and survey the surrounding area with your own eyes and you find that your are in fact not alone on this planet. On the fifth day you spotted from atop a small mountain a large city of human construction. You estimated that the city was two days travel on foot from your base camp and you could even spot little humans from the position. That same day you didn't see but could feel that you were getting near a large number of Orks (northeast of your base) but human activity in the direction was too large and you decided to make your way back.

Dubshredda returns to camp excited the see the first signs of squigs scurrying about the camp. Soon they will sprout from the ground in a plenty that can sustain his small but hungry orks. He spends his next day trying to piece together a trukk for faster transport. He digs through piles of scrap and appropriately shiny bits welded into the barricade walls but fails to make anything remotely close to a moving platform. He does make some wicked metal uber-bits. On the second day back Dubshredda wakes early to the morning sun and prepares an announcement for the boyz. He steps through the muck and dog piles of sleeping greenskinz while handing out satisfying whacks to wake up several of the boyz. He spots a raised lump of dirt sturdy enough to support his weight and decides it is good a place as any for his announcement. After posing himself to his liking on the "stand" he yells out to the orks. "BOYZ! ITZ TIME TA PAY OUR KOUSINZ A VIZIT. WE BE READYIN OURSELVEZ FER WAR, WAR!!! NOW DA BEST FIVE 'UNDRED OF YOUZ LOT GONNA COME WIT ME. DA REST OF YAZ ARE GUNNA TAKE 'DOSE TREES 'ND PILE 'EM IN A BIG CIRCLE ROUND OUR NEW BASE." Dubshredda reaches out his hand pointing towards the south. "YE WHO MAKES DA BEST TREE CIRCLE BE GETTIN PROMOTED! NOW MY GREENSKINZ, MOVE OUT!"

Dubshredda walks purposefully out of the camp expecting his boyz to follow his pace. He plans to lead them a little out of the way to the northeast to see what was calling to him.

You set out with a fervor to the Northeast with the best five hundred boyz you got remaining. The boyz sing a pirates tune as you march for the next couple of days through woods, fields, and mountains. Some of the boyz take some pot shots at local wildlife to have a bit of sport and there is of course the occasional brawl to make things entertaining. All in all it's a good sunny couple of days to be an Ork with the yellow sun overhead ALL THE FUCKING TIME. Ahem... Anyway, after three days you find yourself moving along the side of a ravine with a healthy sized river to your right and mountains to your left before you suddenly start to hear the sound of explosives going off a distance up ahead.

Your boyz hearing the explosions all at once cease their singing and shanties and look right in the direction they're coming from. This goes on for a couple of moments before you hear a loud battle cry echo through the ravine and you begin to feel your heart race "WAAAAGH!"

A pointy earz or an 'umie would quietly approach the sound of war and destruction ahead, but not an ork. Dubshredda raises his power klaw to the sky and yells "CHARGE YA GOONZ! WE KANT BE LEFT OUTTA DA FIGHT!". Dubshredda rushes forward with blood pulsing and feet thundering as he nears the bend to discover what new excitement awaits.

As you pass the bend you take a moment to take in the sights. In raised positions on a mountain you see Imperial forces with tanks and infantry holding against a large Ork horde. You see a literal see of Orks clamoring up to the Imperial positions being gunned down by the guardsman making their stand. Among the Ork ranks you can see deffdreads, mechboyz, truks, and even the occasional weirdboy. With a successful perception role you even manage to pick out a couple of key details of the battle:

On the other side of the Ork forces is a river that bends around the Imperial position. At the guardsman fortifications you can see a number of large artillery pieces at the very top guarded by a number of what appear to be mechanized infantry. In front of those men on the bastions are several lines of entrenched infantry. All of these humans appear to be guarding what is likely the best means of crossing the large river. Whether the Orks realize they could probably find another way around or just went to a fight isn't clear. Within the Ork popultion you do manage to spot one individual who stands out from the rest. An enormous figure in some Mega-Armor is barking out orders to the rest of the boyz. Your instincts tell you this must be WAAAGH Bloodwrench. And sure enough he carries a large wrench in one of his hands waving it around and smacking any boy who isn't listening to him

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Dubshredda points towards the nearest side of the formidable greentide. "WE GETTIN OUR FILL TODAY BOYZ. TO DA AKTION!"

With renewed energy you and your boyz begin bolting forward as fast as you can towards the Imperial positions. As you make it to the skinny part of the river you begin coming under fire from the Imperial lasguns and a number of your boyz begin dying but not nearly enough to concern yourself with. You yourself take a couple of shots but they fail to do more than burn some of the hair off your chest. As you cross the river you join up with the charging Ork horde and join them in the assault. As explosive shells go off all around you green flesh is turned into mist and heavy machine gun fire rips into the charging lines. You brave the fire and lead your boyz straight into the center of the enemy positions where you come face to face with an infantry platoon.

Roll Initiative

Dubshreddas hardened boyz barrel towards the infantry shrugging off their attacks and crashing into the human ranks. Dubshredda and his boys traded blow after blow with their enemies. Between the flashes of light and sprays of blood the boyz could see their Kaptin's wild grin. With his orkish might he cut his way further and further into their ranks. The band of freebooterz was on the verge of overwhelming their foe, their joy and exhilaration bursting forth as they enjoyed fresh blood. Just as soon as however, the imperial guard pulled back. Their detestable sergeant calling out a retreat! The guardsmen ran back in swift and organized fashion weaving between the mechanized infantry. Dubshredda was furious! How could he be denied his fight? He started chasing after the heels of these weak and cowardly 'umies. As he approached the other orks and the "imposing" bastion he spotted one! A high ranking 'umie hiding inside a metal shell! "WAAAGH!!!" cried Dubshredda, as he charged headlong at the APC.

Dubshredda hops up upon the chimera and in the midst of lasfire and artillery bombardments he rips off the top of the armored vehicle and calls out to commissar inside. The human responds to the iron faced Kaptin by joining him on the chimera top. They clashed in glorious combat, Dubshredda danced around his foe's chainsword and in turn the commissar found the strength to deflect Dubshredda's klaw strikes. Finally in a swift blur of metal and blood Dubshredda rended the commissar's head from his body. Such was the intensity of the ork's blow that the commissar's body was set on fire. Dubshredda held the disfigured head out towards the imperial guardsmen within the chimera and declared: "I am KAPTIN DUBSHREDDA! I BRING DA BEAT 'ND DROP YUR KOMMANDAZ 'EADZ!" and dropped down into the 'umie trukk.

With the display of your victory the entirety of the human line begins to break. The mechanized infantry your boyz are currently engaged with flee and many are cut down as they do so. You watch, and are unfortunately unable to do anything about it, as the enemy artillery pulls from the ridge top and begin falling back. Left and right the humans of the Imperium are cut down as they cover the retreat of much of the mechanized infantry. As you crest the Imperial positions you look down to see the Imperial vehicles carrying troops and artillery pieces driving across the wide and dangerous river risking the waves instead of getting cut down. The day is won as the Imperials retreat to better defensive positions.

After some time celebrating and head taking you hear a loud bellow from below "Who was da one who took me fun! I'll punch da lil' snotling in his jaw and rip out his teef if he ain't gots a good explanations for this one! I'm Boss Bloodwrench n' I gets me fun!"

Kaptin Dubsredda drives out from the destruction and chaos and pokes his head out of hole torn through the front of the chimera. "Wuz me. I be Kaptin Dubshredda of Fur-Sha 'nd Tan-Rom. Da boyz in da front wer bein slow so I kut in line. I heardz 'bout ya far far away from 'ere. Yur da big boss of da WAAAGH! 'nd I'm 'ere ta get in on da fight." Kaptin drops the charred commissar head to the ground and rolls over it with the chimera to show "bonding".

Now that you can see the Warboss you get a much better look at him. Bloodwrench is covered head to toe in what appears to be personal mega-armor with a twin linked rockit launcha built into one of the arms and his other arm carries a large and bloodied wrench that crackles with electricity around it. His lower jaw is covered by the maga-armor but you can still see four large teef jutting from it out of he armor. On the Orks back is a trophy rack displaying grisly trophies of conquest. Among them are two strange skulls that look like they belonged to large beasts but what stands out is the five bloody helmets all colored a dark green. Chained to the warbosses armor are four attack squigs that roam about him in a meter radius and growl at anything coming close.

Bloodwrench snarles at the charred Commissars head and says "Kaptin ya see greenskin?! Where'z ya ship den Kaptin?! You'ze comes searchin' for a scrap cause you bloody found one then boy! Come outta that humie metal bawx and let me gets a goodz looks at ya!"

With a hefty push Dubshredda kicks open the chimera hatch. Bloodied bodies and broken weapons fumble out into a grisly pile. There's an audible squish when Dubshredda hops onto the pile to exit the imperial vehicle. For a moment the Kaptin stands there scowling at Bloodwrench. The warboss did not break into a murderous charge at the first possible moment, a good sign. Out of approval for Bloodwrenche's patience, (a relative term when dealing with orks) Kaptin Dubshredda approaches the warboss. "'Ay ya see I'm nuttin but true greenskin."

Bloodwrench rubs the chin of his armor in contemplation. After a couple seconds he walks right up to you and gives you a solid punch in the shoulder "Aye! You is green thru an' thru! I cants be mad at a boy who just was eaga' at fight! Just be sha' ha leaves some for the rest a us! Far az I'm concern' ya already family so welcome R's WAAAGH! Blood wrench!" As he pronounces his WAAAGH! all the nearby boyz shout out in triumph

"Kaptin Dubshredda 'nd 'iz boyz be eaga ta fight right long side ya!" To which Dubshredda's remaining ranks also shout out in triumph. "Warboss Bloodwrench, wuts yur 'orde of boyz gunna do now? Do ya be pursuin da 'umies?". As Bloodwrench takes a moment to respond Dubshredda motions for his boyz to get the chimera moving.

Your boyz begin getting the APC ready for travel. Blood tench slams his metal fists together and says "Weze had a goods fightin taday. Gotta pick up da scraps and heads back at da rest of me boyz and get den ready for da big one! Dere's a humie city ova there and Weze gonna takes it fa da Orks! Da humies already sent some big un fella's afta us buts we killed all twenty of dem! Now we gotta finish dis and gets da shiny bits to gets off dis rok!"

Dubshredda agrees with the sentiment. The imperial blockade is littered with the burning hulls of APCs and debris ripe for plundering. He orders a group of orks to retrieve another thousand orks from base camp. He bids the messenger group a rude goodbye and turns around to scavenge the battlefield. The debris field is rich with shiny bitz perfect for some ork "kreativity" and kustomizing. He gets what he needs to upgrade his weapon with shocky bitz and spikey bitz (scarce and abundant repsectively). Once satisfied with the additions to his klaw he works with his boyz to piece together as many functional trukks and deffguns as possible. Towards the end of day Dubshredda takes a moments rest from building up troop transports to survey Bloodwrench's greentide.

As the scavenging begins throughout the rest of the day the couple of messengers head off to retrieve the rest of your boyz. It will take them likely a week or so to get them or even get them to follow. With your adjustments to your power klaw made and the rest of your boyz working away you find a nice vantage point to look out over Bloodwrenches horde. The number of Orks that had been in the battle (more like a skirmish really) are completely dwarfed by the scale of the full WAAAGH! The entire area is completely covered in Orks that you guess to number at least a million. You see massive fleets of truks carrying materials about, covens of mekboys working together to create some of the larger Ork inventions such as dakkajets, mek gunz, and deff dreads, and you also spot a group of three gorkanauts being worked on and repaired by whole hosts of boyz. Overall it is an extremely intimidating sight WAAAGH! Bloodwrench and you can't help but feel a little in over your head.

Without a larger band of boyz Dubshredda is certain he'll meet an early demise in this campaign against the imperials. In an effort to bolster his forces Dubshredda goes from one small collection of boyz to another brow beating as many as he can into joining his forces. He has fantasies of standing proud over a WAAAGH! such as this and seeing the destruction they wreak. However, he's all too aware that such fantasies are unattainable as he is now. Instead he takes advantage of his low key reputation among the orks to gather from the lower ranks of the horde. What are several thousand greenskins in the face of a mighty a million? Not to mention that this tide may extend well beyond the local battlefront.

Indeed you go around with such vigour slapping boyz over the heads to get their attention that you manage to quickly refill the ranks of your depleted forces. Before long you manage to recuperate your losses from the initial landing and by weeks end you are once again 5K stong. Over this time the rest of the WAAAGH! has had its fair share of fun and Bloodwrench is ready for some fresh bloodshed. You receive a message from a snotling that the big Boss wants to speak with you.

Dubshredda picks up the snotling and launches it across the base camp. He listens to bigger orks, not orkoids. He gathers a posse of 10 boyz and marches through the camp towards the largest and shiniest pile of bitz. Surely the warboss will be found there if anywhere.

You head to the location of the choicest bits in the and sure enough you can hear the now familiar sound of Bloodwrench barking out orders. He spots you marching through the crowd and gives you a big toothy grin before yelling over to you "Eye Kaptin! Goodz of ya ta answer me call! I've gots a very special missionz forz ya that only an Ork who talk ta the little uns oftenz can do!"

The larger orks surrounding Bloodwrench make way through the crowd for you. There is the usual rude crude remarks sent in our direction and you can tell that many of them involve your being a freebooter.

"Anytin' if it meanz we get plenty of carnage and plunder. Wat it be Warboss Bloodwrench?" The orks that choose to wander the void in search of treasure are an eccentric lot. Part and parcel off the oddboy status means caring not for the jeers of the planetbound greenskins.

"It's good ta see ya willin' ta serve! Now listen here, I'ze need ya ta go over to da humie city and talk ta them. Makes sure ya get ta talk ta dere Big Boss and tell em dat we are comin'. I wants ta make sure dere is a good fight waitin' for us whenz we gets there cause da humies ain't put ups a real goodz fights yet. Ya do dat fo' me an I'll sharez a secrets for ya dat only a space Ork can undastand!" he says waving his wrench around

Dubshredda nods. "Da fiercer da fight da betta glory. I'll do wat you say." Dubshredda walks off with his posse and rounds up enough boyz to fill 10 trukks. While they organize themselves and bicker over who gets to drive Dubshredda patches together a powerful loudspeaker, appropriately named the "Dubphone" to project his voice past the firing line setup by the imperial guardsmen. Dubshredda knows the humans won't suffer the presence of a greenskin at this point. Even if they let him in it will only be to shoot him in the back like the cowards they are. To be even more certain his message will get across he creates several "Dubspeakers" and attaches them to his APCS (granted some of them aren't even hooked up to his Dubphone). When all of his machinations are assembled and installed on the trukks he sets out to the edge of the firing line. He has cunningly placed his trukk a little towards the back of his caravan.

And so you arrive at the "edge" of the Imperial firing line. Looming a ways ahead of you you can see the towering buildings of the city in the distance an in front of that you can make out hundreds of humans running about what looks to be an extremely well fortified firing position. With yourself placed in the back you tap the mic to see if it's working and all of the speakers, even the ones not hooked up, blast the sound of your tapping.

"'EAR YE, 'EAR YE 'UMIES. WARBOSS BLOODWRENCH HAZ SENT ME, KAPTIN DUBSHREDDA TO DELVAR UNTO YE A MESSAGE: PREPARE UR VERY BEST DAKKA DAKKA 'ND VERY BEST TIN KANZ. THE WAAAGH! IZ COMIN 'ND IT EXPECTS A FIGHT!"

Your message booms over the human lines and you see all the guardsman turn to look at you. After a couple of moments they go back to their work apparently ignoring you.

Dubshredda spends another five minutes driving around in chaotic patterns repeating variations on his message. After the time has elapsed he turns around and returns to camp.

When you return you can't help but feel as though something is off. You have a sinking feeling that something is wrong and that there's something that you failed to notice or didn't think about. Your suspicions are confirmed when you return to the camp. That is, the lack thereof. The entirety of the Ork camp has completely disappeared with only the smallest bits of scrap to be found about. You wouldn't even know it was there if it wasn't for the large number of footprints currently indented into the ground.

"Hmm me no tink WAAAGH! wuz mind trick. Wut Bloodwrench get from runnin?" Dubshredda directs his caravan to follow the enormous trail left behind by the orks.

As you set off you drive through the remains of the camp and spot a group of Orks scrounging through the scrap. As you move over to them the Orks sitting on thepile of metal are picking through and tossing aside shiny pieces; taking a couple of seconds to examine choice pieces. After a good look at them you realize that they're your boyz and when one of them spots your truks coming he begins jumping up and down waving to you and the other boyz start doing the same.

Dubshredda facepalms and groans. "Oh ma boyz, dey be loyal ... but effin stupid." He and his caravan move to their position and upon arrival asks what the story behind the disappearing WAAAGH! is.

You head over to your boyz and as you attach them one speaks up in giberrish that's not just grunts "Boss! Boss! We knews ha come backs! Get a move on dey said! Boyz are doin' dey said! Buts looks as us Boss Weze stillz here!"

This goes on for a while and it takes every ounce of patience you can muster to not squeeze his head till it pops like a grape. Finally he actually starts putting the oxygen he's using to good use "Dere was a bigz flashez formz da sky and BOOM! Suddenly dere be deze big metal peoplez all whitez who starts killin' eva'eone. Befa' long da Big Boss Starts tellin evyone at attack an befa we knewz it evyone chasing afta deze black fella's on bikes and da whole WAAAGH! Is done run off!" The other Orks nod in agreement to this crazy, and barely coherent, tale.

"'Nd wur da whole WAAAGH! done gone ta chase da tin kanz?" Dubshredda asks. He's keenly aware that there will be a disaster of some sort at hand, and he is morbidly curious to watch.

"Da boss, da Big Boss was angry at dem and he orda'd a chasen. Da white ones dissapea'd a quick a de kame buts da loudz black onez ranz away. Craziest ting eva' Boss I's tells ya." as the Ork finishes one of the others shouts over the group "What's about da humie'?! Dere was a humie walkin' abouts buts she'z didn't mindz us."

Dubshredda lifts up his useless soldier and barks at him: "POINT WUR DEY WENT BOY OR IMA BEAT YA."

"Bwahahahahaha!" shouts the Ork as he's violently shaken. When he regains some semblance of composure he points off to the North.

"Den off we go. Lezzee wut Bloodwrench duz wen da 'umies be sendin in da big dakka." And with that, Dubshredda leads his caravan after the ill-fated WAAAGH!.

And off you go with your boyz towards what you hope to not be your speedy demise. Your truks rumble along the path that the WAAAGH! has taken. You take the time to backtrack over the narrow part of the river initially deciding it best not to risk it and that the entire WAAAGH! isn't going to get far. The hours go by as you sit nice and comfortable in your truk watching as you drive past large forests and mountains. As you continue you start to pass by some rather gruesome sights, or rather happy sights since you're an Ork.

Littering the path you are following are the corpses of dozens of Orks initially. Faces blown off, lower halves missing, and others burned to a crisp. The dozens of Ork bodies begin turning into hundreds and soon enough you begin to hear the familiar sounds of battle coming from over a ridge and the unbelievable sight of macrobattery fire raining down from above. Once you come up and over you get a nice view of a terrific battle going on half a mile away.

Beyond your position, and actually nearest to you, you see the enormous Ork horde barreling forward towards the positions of large dark green warriors wearing cloaks and normal small squishy humans with their laser pointers I mean rifles. The large squadrons of Ork mechs appear to currently be surging forward the the right flank of the large green warriors but are being harassed and blown up by lightning fast and loud black armored warriors. You spot weirdboyz conjuring their powers towards the warriors and humans and general large amounts of DAKKA being thrown about.

The humans appear to also be charging forward to battle with the sounds of their artillery going off from beyond a large hill they are all surging forward from. Vehicles rush across the fields plowing over Orks unlucky enough to be in their way while infantry follow suit to deal killing blows with massed fire. Strangely enough the humans don't appear to be charging straight into the bulk of the Ork horde as any good fighta' would do but are rushing through the outskirts of the horde toward the warriors.

Speaking of which what you see of these large dark green warriors is utter carnage. Large metal boxes larger then most Ork tanks stride forward unleashing impressive amounts of DAKKA or loosing torrents of flame. Striding in front of these large metal behemoths are warriors in bone white armor cutting their way through the Ork horde as much as shooting it while the rest of the warriors move behind the heavy wall formation. The black armored warriors blaze around the green and white warriors killing any who manage to get too close. Also strangely enough these warriors of impressive DAKKA are moving towards the humans and you have now noticed that they are shooting at each other.